Somebody give my an MTV show

If only I were 14...I would totally get an MTV show. 

Then I could punch people and go to jail and talk back to my mother and....wait......OK so we are way better off.

We were pretty surprised to find out we were expecting again just a few short months after Nick was born.  Take your birth control ladies!!! Is there a support group for people like me? "Hi, my name is Joanna and I'm pregnant...again."


When hearing the news Nick laughed and I cried for 2 days straight. Just as I was getting used to the idea, I went to visit the person I see more than my parents.....my OBGYN.

She started by telling me that I would be ok and that her mother had like 11 kids and none of them were more than 18 months apart. Please, she is well into her 40's which makes her mom well into at least her 60's (if she was the 11th kid she could be in her 80's). Did they even have birth control then?

Anyway, she then hit me with a shocker????  She said what I thought she would never say!  "I think we should try for a VBAC." 

Ok here is where it gets a little gross so only read this after 9pm when the kids are in bed and people can swear on t.v.

A VBAC is a vaginal birth after cesarean.  Since Nicky was sliced out of me just a few months ago, I assumed that this one would be too.  I had at least 3 people tell me that the doctor wouldn't do a VBAC unless it had been like 2 years since your last birth.


So I immediately start stuttering and tearing up.  "Um, wha wha what do you mean? Is that sa sah something that can be done?"  The Doc says, "Sure, I just did one yesterday and you are a really good canidate."  I explained to her that it was so soon and she reminded me that I was healthy and healed really fast and that the chance of something going wrong was so much slimmer than anything that can go wrong normally.


I started bawling right there in the room.  She looked stunned and asked me what was wrong.  Through my mumbled words and tear streaked face I told her. "I just don't think I'll be a good pusher!!!! It will be too big! I won't be able to push it out? I don't even know how to push? Can't you just cut me open?!?"

She was stunned. She really thought I was nervous about the chance of my uterus rupturing. I wasn't concerned at all about that, I just didn't think I could push a baby out.  She kinda chuckled a little (she knows me well enough and is familiar with my "give me an epidural in the elevator" attitude). She assured me that it was my choice and we didn't have to make a decision right away.  We would first wait and see if this would be another breech baby.

The Doc also in nicer words than I use, told me that I'm a big weirdo and no one has ever pleaded with her to cut them open again!  Hey there's a first for everything.  I've told her several times that I'm a fan on the c-section and she can give my number to mom's freaking out about it.

I already purchased my ticket on ebay...haha

So in the end, we'll just wait and see.  My next ultrasound is September 22nd, so I can not worry about it until then (because of course it will be facing the right way and then I have to have the discussion all over again and freak out about my fear of pushing).


I also want to say to all of you sitting there saying, "I gave birth with no drugs every time.  She's a big wuss!"  First of all, mad props for using the word wuss. Also I give you credit.  You are superwoman. I just admit that I am not and am terrified and don't do pain well.

This picture better describes me:

Maybe instead of an MTV show, I should be on that Discovery Health show I'm Pregnant And...


I'm Pregnant And Scared To Have A Baby.