Ready or Not......

Nick and I went to childbirth class this weekend.  Like literally allllllllll weekend. It was kinda interesting because it was really the first time Nick had learned about some of the child birth material.  You know me, I like to research everything like crazy.  Now that class is over, I'm pretty sure if it was graded, Nick and I would have gotten a C.  We definitely did not take it seriously.  

On the first day, we took a break and Nick went to the vending machine.

It was all healthy crap like kashi bars and diet soda.  He was super ticked, definitely not anything for him to eat.

The instructor made us practice a lot of breathing techniques and do some "visualizations" to relax.  This was us:

 Sorry but I just can sit on the floor in front of a bunch of strangers and think about, "a beautiful flower opening" or "a warm sea breeze" without cracking up.  Do these people really think they are going to be laying in a hospital bed, in the middle of a contraction thinking about kittens and sunshine?
Another part of the class was learning different positions for getting through labor and contractions:

At one point the instructor had cards with a bunch of labor positions on them and said, "OK dads, please come pick a position and mom will have to do it for you."

Ha!!!!!!!  Isn't that how we got into this situation in the first place? Clearly, we were not the most mature couple there. 
We were each asked the first word to come to mind when we thought of labor.  My word....terrifying.  Everyone laughed at me.  By the end of the first day, several people changed their words from exciting, anticipating, etc. to join me on the terrified side.  Ha! and they had the nerve to laugh at me.  I told ya so....


There were also lots of birthing videos we watched.  I thought that would gross Nick out the most.  He was perfectly ok until the instructor talked about this:

The epidural.  He was completely grossed out by it!  Really? He just saw a video of an actual birth, and the epidural bothers him?

Speaking of pain medication, the instructor put up a line and had us rate how comfortable we feel like receiving some sort of pain relief.  1 was "I want absolutely nothing, completely natural" 10 was "definitely, give it to me in the parking lot"  Here was my response:

I don't do pain well at all. I barely make it through a headache.  By the way, everyone else was between a 3-7. Well at least I'm not wishy washy....

I was pretty comfortable during the class, and didn't get totally grossed out or emotional.  Really proud of myself for how far I've come in realizing I really have to give birth to this kid.  Then the tour happened......

They took us on a tour of the maternity ward and showed us where we would go and what we would do there.  Then the jokes stopped.  I got really quiet.  Saw this:

Clammy hands, gulp, shortness of breath, gulp. Is it getting hot in here?

I totally freaked!!!!!  I don't do hospitals.  I pictured myself in the bed with the gown on and thought:

Let's go back 7 months and rethink this having a kid thing.  Now remember, I just watched several videos of live births, unedited!  That wasn't a problem.  But put me in a room with beds and monitors and more importantly  THE SMELL!!!!!

I really can't handle the hospital smell.  I've been home for 3 hours and I can still smell it.  I think it's in my hair! I had to get out of there. I got to the parking lot and my eyes welled up.  I can't do this.....

Like it or not, this baby is coming.  Guess I better get prepared.  Add hospital scented candle to my Christmas list so I can slowly prepare myself for the smell.

Furniture!!!

Today we got our new baby furniture.  We got some great deals and spent less money on more furniture!  I love a good deal.  I'm kicking myself for not getting some great photographic evidence of the all day process it took to actually get the furniture to the house, but I'm pretty sure there would have been several people very angry.  Here is the unpacking:

 Boxes and styrofoam everywhere!  I'll be finding little foam pieces for months.

Keep up the good work Daddy!

 I swear I helped too, I was just the one with the camera.

 Dresser and changing table 

Crib

Now we just need to add all the stuff....and of course a baby!

Thanks Daddy for putting together the crib, and for the heavy lifting.

Thanks Grandma Monica for coming with us and for the new swing.  I put it together but forgot to get a picture.

Thanks Grandpa Mike for the use of your big truck, and for running down here at the last minute.

28 weeks, 3 Days

 Here is the latest belly picture:

Carpet and Halloween

Here is a picture of our Halloween costume:

This is after a long day and my hoop is a little mangled from kids pulling on it, but I'm a basketball hoop and baby Nick is the basketball!  Completely homemade and I got lots of laughs at work!


Now on to our brand new carpet.  We re-carpeted almost the entire house this week. It's now all dog stain free and ready for a baby to lay on.  Here are some pics:

By the way, check out my sweet painting skills in the baby's room.

The Kelly Home Project Extravaganzaa!

It's been extreme home makeover Kelley edition around here lately.  We've decided to take on some home improvement projects before the baby is born.  I hate to spend large amounts of money (it's literally painful for me) but be it hormones, frustration, desperation, or all of the above, I've agreed to several projects.
1. Tree removal.  Nick decided to cut down the tree in the front yard that spits leaves from October through May and then starts all over again. I'm kicking myself for not getting any pictures of the process, but I was scared.  Because this guy:

 Combined with one of these:

Could be quite terrifying.  I had the fire department on standby. But he did good and got the entire neighborhood involved and the tree was down and cleared today in just a few hours...Check.

2.  Carpet.  New carpet for 90% of the house will be installed on Wednesday.....Check.


3.  Baby's room.  Here is the room before:

As you can see, we really never used this room.

 Can you guess what color scheme we are going with?  I painted the entire room today, but no sneak peaks until it's done....which should be sometime within the next 3 months :)

This pic is for mom.  She wanted a full shot that's, "Not just a close up of a stomach!"  Please ignore the bags under my eyes and the hair that's a mess.  This was after an 11 hour work day.  I thought I was going to give birth right there if Nick didn't hurry up and take that picture so that I could sit down.


That's the updates for now.  I'll post fabulous before and after carpet pictures after Wednesday. 

Halloween

Fall is my favorite season, and Halloween is one of my fav. holidays.  I've already been thinking about baby Nick's costume for next year.  But in the meantime, I have no other choice but to torture Charlie.  So the question is, what will he be this year????  A friend from Nick's work had a couple old costumes that she gave us.  One was a rooster.  So we decided to play fashion show:

He was totally ticked the entire time.  This is what happened when we took the costume off:

 Complete refusal to look at me.

    "Mom, I will pee on all your curtains if you put that on me again."
Just wait until I can cordinate his costumes with the baby's.  Muh ha ha ha ha!! 

23 Weeks, 2 days

Here we go!  Updated belly shot

 

Congrats!

Congratulations to Shannon, Nic and big sister Reagan on the arrival of little Liam!!!  Baby Nick is literally kicking with excitement over his new best bud!

Can I get royalties from this name?

So way back when we were just dating, Nick mentioned that when he had children, he wanted his first son to be a Jr.  I kinda said, "Oh that's nice," knowing that I would be able to change his mind before that time came.  Well folks, the time has come and I have NOT been able to change his mind!  Nick is dead set of having a Nicholas Jr.  I had great arguments against the Jr. too:
 1.  And most important:  ITS A FREAKING TV NETWORK!!

           Seriously every time I hear it I think of this guy:

                Face from t.v.  Remember him?  "Face here! Blue's clues is on next!"  If my son comes out looking like this guy.......   At least there will be lots of clothing apparel and toys with his name on it.

 b.  How do I know who's mail is who's????
3. When our son turns 18 and ventures off into the real world and messes up with thousands of dollars in debt, Who do you thinks credit score is going to drop drastically because little mess up didn't distinguish between Sr. and Jr. on his credit applications?  It happens to people every day.

d. What do I say around the house??? Nick's response was, "Call him Nick and call me a nickname."  So all day I've been walking around saying, "Oh Nickname? Can you come over here and help me?  Oh Nickname!  Switch the laundry."   Yep, I've gone low and resorted to sarcasm.

While there are some Jr's. out there that we would like to forget like John Wayne Gacy Jr. (famous serial killer) or Dick Smothers Jr. (porn star)(I had to look that one up, honest).  And then there is Al Gore Jr. who hid his Jr. while in office because he didn't want people to know. (uh huh)

Although, if I were Al Gore Sr. I'd be more inclined to hide. (Please don't kick me off the Internet you supposedly "invented" Al)
There are also some pretty great Jr's. out there:

Martin Luther King Jr.  I mean, he gets an entire holiday.

Actor Harry Connick Jr. (I do love Hope Floats)

Sports Legend Ken Griffey Jr.

And who can forget the ladies man: Dale Earnhardt Jr.?


So the fates have spoken.  No matter how many brilliant arguments I have come up with, the fate of poppyseed has been sealed.....Nicholas Stephen Jr.
 


I'm coming to terms with it.  However, when little Nick comes to me and says, "Mommy why do I have the same name as Daddy?"  I will definitely respond, "Well buddy, daddy is crazy sometimes and forced me to name you Nick, when I wanted a super awesome name like Superman!"  


What?  Like you parents out there have not played your cards against your spouse to try to be the favorite?  Gimme a break.


So here's a toast to you little Nick, I tried.


 

Ready....Set....Shop!

Ok.  We did it.  Today we registered for baby junk items.  People were asking and Grandma Monica couldn't wait another second.  Registries should be up and ready to go by this afternoon at: 

 

We are both exhausted!  Nick is currently napping.  Somehow it wore him out more than I.  I don't think he has been inside a BabiesRUs before.  When we walked in and he looked at the gigantic store lined wall to wall with baby goodies, he had one of these moments:

He pretty much just followed behind me like a lost puppy.  I let him make simple decisions like, "Do you like the blue receiving blankets with trucks or animals?"

The entire time I didn't let my death grip off of my favorite shopping device:

 Ahhh.  If I could only register for the registry gun......

Happy shopping everyone!!!!  Also, I didn't really register for many clothes because I know how you all shop.  You are just going to pick out outfits you think are cute whether they are on the list or not.  It's ok.  I've done it too.

 

Growth update

Had a checkup this week.  Everything is still perfectly normal.  Heartbeat is good.  Baby boy is doing well.  I gained 7 pounds since last month.....ooops.  Guess I have to cut down on the spinach dip and potato chips.  As the good Doc said, "Well you've caught up since not gaining anything, but let's not gain 7 pounds every month."  I'll keep you updated on the little guy's progress.  Have to do another belly pic again soon...

Kids Say The Darndest.....Part 2

Just spit it out already!

Making my morning rounds, I walked into a room of 4 year olds.   While chatting with the teacher, one child came right up to me.  I should let you know ahead of time that this child has NO patience and speaks as fast as this guy:

(It's the guy from the Micro Machines Commercials....you know the one that talks really, really fast)

Anyway.....

This little boy walks right up pokes me in the belly and says:

"Hey what's that?"
Me: It's a baby
Child: "What? It's a baby? Let me see?"  He tries to look under my shirt

Me: "Oh no! It's in there.  It's in my belly"
He looks at me very curiously.  Thinks for a moment and then says:

Spit it out!!!!!!


Now, I know you can have a baby this way:

And we tell kids babies come this way:

But someone forgot to tell me you can just: 

News to me!  Didn't know you could just spit out a baby.

Kids Say The Darndest.....Part 1

My White Baby

I work daily with between 80-90 children ranging in age from 6 weeks to 12 years old.  I spend the lots of time with the "troubled" kids that get sent to me for being naughty, but I make a point to see all 80 some kids daily.  When getting pregnant, I knew I had to prepare myself for the sensitive questions children are likely to ask.  I was ready for , "Where do babies come from?" or, "How did it get in there?" or even, "How does it come out."  Little did I know, my students would send me a pack of entirely different questions.

My group of school age students had just found out that I was pregnant.  Here is how the conversation went:

1st grader: Ms. Joanna, are you having a boy or girl?
Me: I don't know yet
1st grader: I bet it's a girl cuz you're a girl
Me: Well....your mommy is a girl and she had you, a boy
1st grader:  walks off totally confused

2 minutes later....

1st grader: Ms. Joanna, Is your baby gonna be white?

Me: (completely stunned as my assistant walks away trying not to laugh)  Yes, my baby will be white
1st grader: Oh, cuz you're white right?
Me: Well that's half of it
2nd grader walks over: Well my mommy is white and I'm not white!

From here I took a deep breath and dove into the topic of skin color while keeping a mental note to prepare staff for angry parents wanting to know why their children are asking questions about white and black babies. 


After keeping my composure during the conversation, I walked to my office and laughed so hard I cried.

Sometimes you prepare so much you are bound to be hit with a doozie!  Ahhh childhood innocence.

 

Crazy Dreams

So they say that during pregnancy you have strange dreams.  The past couple of nights I have had a recurring dream that is very strange. For those that know me well, don't worry.  This has nothing to do with my fear of bridges.  It all starts out with these guys:

 (actual picture from our back yard by the way)

Except the deer in my dream look more like this:

?

 The scene goes down at my parents house.  Why? No idea.  Each time I am walking from the side street to my parents house and see a huge deer staring at me as I get closer.  As I approach the house, he starts to chase me.  I have to run all the way around the house to try to get away from the deer.  My sweet track skills from high school keep me just a step ahead of the deer. (Grandad, don't tell everyone how fast I really ran in high school.) Last night during my dream I made it all the way around to the back of the house and up the back steps when:

 Bam!  He speared me like a bull. I instantly woke up in a sweat with my heart pounding.  

These dreams have been happening so often that I have found myself coming up with sneaky options of outsmarting deer throughout my day.  Here is what I've come up with:

 Hide behind a bush.  Deer can't be that smart, I could just hang out behind one of these until he goes away.

Dress up as a deer so that we can be friends instead of enemies.

Yep that's all I got.  Never crossed my mind to actually shoot the deer, or the sheer fact that deer are afraid of humans and in the real world would more than likely run from me than after me.

If you think of any other "deer outsmarting" tricks, please let me know.  Here's to hoping the deer costume works tonight, I don't have high hopes for the bush.